I just spent a week in Curacao.  It it a Dutch Island in the Netherland Antilles.   (For the geographically challenged it is next to Aruba and off the coast of Venezuela where, co-incidentally I went to on my honeymoon.) There were a lot of Dutch tourists there.  They are a blond people.  I am not a blonde person.  (Far from it.)  Yet a few times people asked me if I was Dutch.  It made me laugh.  (I am easily amused.)  And they speak a strange guttural language.   When they pronounce a “G” it sounds like they are clearing their throat of about a gallon of phlegm.   I asked one young woman how they avoid spitting on people when they talk.  Luckily she laughed.  It was this same young (very young) woman who, when  discovering I was older than her mother,  screamed, at the top of her lungs to the other young Dutch crew member:   SHE’S OLDER THAN MY MUDDER.   And after she screamed “she’s older than my mudder” 4 times I tossed her off the catamaran.  Such a shame. She was a lovely Dutch girl.

The Dutch may be able to speak many languages, but can’t pronounce the “th” sound easily.  I am a champ with the “th” sound.  HA!  So there.

We had a great time, I have a fabulous tan, only got sick once (on a catamaran that was traveling against 10 foot swells – barf-o-rama!) and I’ve been back to work one day and am ready to put a gun to my head.   Whatever relaxed feeling I had is GONE, GONE, GONE.   Maybe happy hour needs to begin in my living room.    Very soon.   Like now.

I promised my sister (and myself) I would try and give some watercolors a shot while on vacation.  Here are two versions of the view from our hotel terrace.   Both were quick studies done either while trying to decide whether to go to the pool or the beach. Or which happy hour to go to.  These are the only two I am willing to show.  The others really sucked.  And for those of you who are asking, in the top painting, those are supposed to be rocks, not the Loch Ness Monster.

Some fun facts about Curacao or stuff on the island.  Most residents speak FOUR yes FOUR languages.   (Makes me feel damn stupid!)  Makes me think of that old joke:   A person who speaks three languages is trilingual.  A person who speaks two languages is bilingual.  A person who speaks one language:  American.   It was fascinating to see them go from English to Spanish to Dutch to Papiamentu without thinking.     There is an ostrich farm on the island.  An ostrich egg is equal to approximately 24 chicken eggs.  (Matt enjoyed an ostrich omelette with ostrich ham and bacon before the tour.)  There are a lot of rocky beaches and it is quite windy which is nice when the sun is strong.  There is a beautiful national park on the western end of the island called Shete Boka (seven mouths in Papiamentu) where we did some hiking.  The food wasn’t great.  But a great time was had by all.